This year’s Thanksgiving was so different from past year’s. Instead of enjoying prime rib at my brother’s house and hanging out with his family, we were all home this year. What was also weird was that I started experiencing some discomfort during breakfast time: lightheadedness at first, then fast heart rate as well as a tight squeeze of my right ribcage. The more I wondered about whether or not I was experiencing a heart problem, the more uneasy I felt. I could well be having another panic attack, but it was really hard to tell. We had ordered food from this catering company this year, and I was supposed to go pick it up myself. Bob ended up driving me there, and on the way there I was feeling my heart rate go up that I almost wanted him to take me to the emergency room. We didn’t end up going and we did pick up the food, but I felt off for the rest of the afternoon. Dinner was lovely: turkey, green bean casserole, mushroom and asparagus risotto, corn chowder, corn bread stuffing, a lovely salad and pecan pie.
I felt relieved that I didn’t have to cook. We had a wonderful time together despite not spending it with extended family like usual. The kids ate dinner rolls and of all things, salad greens! Nobody touched the turkey, and they were a fan of the pecan pie as this was the first time they had it. Hopefully next year we will be able to spend quality time with our extended family again.
(I am late in writing this post because yesterday I experienced more tightness on my chest which led to the feeling of not being able to breathe deeply. My heart rate went up and I was not feeling the best. I thought it was another panic attack but was also concerned that it was a heart problem. Out of an abundance of caution, Bob took me to the emergency room. We got lucky that nobody was there and I was the next person to be seen. After the doctor saw me and the EKG, things checked out fine. He went onto do a test called D-dimer to check for the chances of blood clot in my body. The test was also negative. He said that it could well be another panic attack and asked that I speak with my primary care physician to discuss the next steps for treatment. I had already made an appointment with my doctor for today after my Thanksgiving day episode. At that visit, my doctor also didn’t think that it was really a heart problem, and said it could be the withdrawal effect of stopping estrogen a couple of months ago when the menopausal symptoms return. But as a reassurance, he referred me to cardiology for a full workup, and said that speaking with a therapist about these symptoms is also a wise next step. Bob’s company offers free counseling for emotional and mental health so I will most likely utilize the services there. Tomorrow I will schedule an appointment with cardiology and go from there. It seems like aging/being in one’s 40 comes with a bunch of health concerns. I would really love to live for a long time so I can watch my kids grow. As a first step, I am motivated to go back to consistently exercising. It is not an option not to do it anymore.)