MicroblogMondays: Crossing Things off the List

I have a huge task list staring at my face whenever I look at my Gmail.

There seems to be ten thousand things to do before our babies arrive.  Although I am not the one carrying so my fatigue has nothing to do with pregnancy, looking at the list is still overwhelming to me and makes me want to hide under the cover and take a nap.

But then, I realize I have to put on my big girl panties and get to the tasks.  I am proud to say that I am slowly tackling the list.

First up was booking a photographer.  My original idea was a maternity photo shoot around 28 weeks with Annie, her family, me, and Bob.  My first choice would have been my pastor’s wife who is a professional photographer.  However, she will not be available around our preferred time plus the cost would skyrocket with flying her there.  She helped me look at the work of photographers local to Annie and we did a lot of back and forth on FB Messenger.  We finally settled on one who was super excited about capturing these moments for us…. until the whole hemorrhoid incident and anxiety attack took place.  If Annie continues to be so uncomfortable, taking pictures of her might not be the best idea.  I really didn’t want to spend so much money on plane tickets, accommodations, session fees for the photography, and other expenses to risk her not feeling well enough for it.  Right after her anxiety attack, we decided to hold off on booking a photographer.  Honestly, I was a little bummed about it because maternity photo shoot had been something that I really wanted to do.  But it’s okay.  I’ll live.  I also had an idea of doing one here just me and Bob and two pairs of baby booties.  Since there is no time limit on it, we can do it anytime, so there is no pressure in booking a session any time soon.  We are going to book that particular photographer for a photo shoot for our C-section though.  So at least I can document it.

Last Friday I checked in with Annie.  She had been feeling a bit better as her symptoms of both hemorrhoids and anxiety were now mild.  She reported that our babies have been very active in the morning and the evening, kicking and moving around.  I told her that I wished I could feel the movements by touching her tummy, but I don’t know when I would make it there.  If I go early to help her out before birth, then I’d spend time with her prior to the babies’ arrival.  She was surprised that we weren’t going to the 28 weeks ultrasound anymore.  She said that if things continue to be better, she should be okay with the maternity photo shoot.  This conversation reignited my hope of getting the maternity photo shoot done.  However, after chatting with Bob, it seems wiser to just stay put and put the money towards other things as it is very expensive to fly the both of us over each time.  I am so glad that Annie is feeling better though.  I hope that her hemorrhoids don’t come back so she’ll continue to be more comfortable.  Poor girl, she can’t sit on her bottom and has to sit on her thighs.

The baby shower was next on the list.  My sister-in-law and my pastor’s wife are hosting.  They live across from each other so they’ll see who will host depending on the size of the party.  After a lot of thinking, we decided on a shower at around 31 weeks.  That will be right after our Hawaii “babymoon”.  I hope that our babies stay put until after that.  I owe my SIL a list of guest and a baby registry.  She can’t send out an invitation without these two things.  I don’t know why but I find the guest list difficult to put together.  Should it be girls only or co-ed?  How many people is too many people?  If we make it girls only, will Bob’s and my guy friends feel left out?  Should we include kids?  Babies?  I don’t plan on having games, so maybe co-ed is okay.  I was told that guys hate baby showers, but this is hardly a conventional baby shower.  So maybe it’s okay to have the guys around?

And then there is this whole thing about where to register.  Like I said before, we don’t have a Buy Buy Baby around us.  We have a Target and Babies R Us close by.  I am tempted to just do Amazon and one of the two brick and mortar stores, but I don’t know what is better.  My friend Jo said that Bed, Bath, and Beyond (and Buy Buy Baby) has the best return policy, which is 365 days.  She buys her big ticket items there and returns them at the store.  That, to me, beats returning things online.  So I have been very indecisive on which site to register at.  And then I also have to decide on what to register.  There are just too many choices out there and I feel overwhelmed every single time I look at the list.  Isn’t registering for baby items supposed to be the fun part of this process?  All I feel is stress, which is not good.  But yeah, I will have to get something started very soon so we can send out the invitation for the shower.

Next up on the list was window treatments.  After our house remodel 4.5 years ago, I lost steam and never did our window treatments.  Our babies’ arrival is a good motivator for me to get my act together.  A few weeks ago, a local company that has very good reviews never returned my call.  So I contacted another company whose owner promptly showed up at my door at the appointed time.  Within an hour, she showed me what might work for the windows in our various rooms and had me choose the styles, colors, pleat size, and light control options.  I was kind of forced into picking the colors and styles, which might be good for me, as I am so indecisive about these things.  Roller shades vs. roman shades vs. cellular shades.  Beige vs. brighter vs. grey.  Room-darkening vs. blackout vs. light filtering.  Bottom up only vs. top down as well.  Again.  So many choices.  My mom quickly made her decision, which helped me in choosing mine.  Without choosing the colors/style, I’d never be able to get an accurate estimate.  I just received the quote for the shades, which is within my expectation.  Window dressing the whole house is an expensive endeavor, so that kind of seals the deal for not traveling to Annie’s town for the 28 week ultrasound.

Clearing our the spare bedroom that will become our “nursery” is the next thing we need to do.  This room has become the dumping ground for miscellaneous, and it also houses our book cases, leftover fertility meds and full sharps containers, toilet papers and paper towels, and a twin mattress.  In order to fix this room, we had to first clear out the garage.  Since we remodeled 4.5 years ago and moved back in, we have put all the things that we didn’t need in the garage.  Over the years, the pile had gotten bigger and bigger, and it all felt like a big black hole.  Without cleaning this mess, I couldn’t possibly allow myself to add the content of the spare bedroom to the mix.  Last Saturday, we got to work and started moving things into piles: donate, sell, electronic waste, recycle, and trash.  We also moved all of the baby stuff that my friend gave me into the living room.  These boxes have been hiding in this garage for the last 4.5 years.  I am so glad that they get to see the light of day.  I also finally cleaned out my 200000 pairs of shoes and only kept those that I will really wear. It was a monumental task to part with my shoes but I was proud of myself for making the cut. I will not get into details, but let me just say that Bob and I didn’t see eye-to-eye on the method of cleaning things out.  This difference in opinion led to a huge fight, and the exhaustion from cleaning made it worse.  Despite this unnecessary fight, we made headway in the garage and cleaned out more than half of the stuff in there.  It is not totally done but we are both proud of the work that we have done so far.  Hopefully after we’re completely done with the garage, we can start packing up the things in the spare bedroom and make ways for baby stuff.

On the list, there is also choosing a pediatrician, registering/attending baby classes, buying a car, and on and on and on.  When I get overwhelmed, Bob always says that he is confident that we will get everything done.  So there is no need to panic.   I will have to remember to take it one day at a time.  Hopefully we’ll be ready by the time the babies make their way into this world.

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12 thoughts on “MicroblogMondays: Crossing Things off the List

  1. One thing at a time! But yes of course it’s a lot to do! The baby shower is a quick decision. Do you want a shower talking about babies and oohing and ahhing at all your gifts and playing silly games? Girls only (and let people Bring their little kids if they want, but many moms will like the opportunity for a girls day out alone). Don’t care about the ooohing and ahhing and just want a time to celebrate their arrival with food, drinks, bob and all your friends? Co Ed.

    It’s time to register girl! Get the list. Go to the store. They will help you. Make educated guesses. No one knows exactly what they will need and when, but the lists are a good place to start. Don’t let it stress you because you can always go and buy what you need later!!

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  2. My husband keeps reminding me that babies actually need very little… Whilst it is nice to have everything in place and organised, it is not essential…this helps me breathe and get perspective when I get overwhelmed!

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  3. Go with BabiesRus. I have never had an issue returning items there with or without receipts. As long as they carried it they took it back without issue. Hang in there mama!

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  4. I’d say go co-ed on the baby shower if you aren’t doing games. Guys still may not come but more people these days are getting over the old fashioned, no men allowed approach.

    Registries are tricky before baby comes and you don’t really know what/how much you will need. Amazon gives you some ideas. My best suggestion is to ask for gift cards to Amazon/ babiesrus etc and you can buy whatever you need before and after the babies arrive. And also, ask for diapers!! It’s awesome to have lots of those stocked up. 🙂

    Your to-do list is really exhausting! I feel for you having to get all that done. And just my 2 cents here but, get a van instead of car. I know they aren’t attractive but oh how much easier they are with kids! We’ve had ours for over a month now and I’m so glad we bought that instead of an SUV.

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    • Yes! I love my van! I was so stubborn and made my station wagon work for two years before caving. If we didn’t take trips with long drives or if we didn’t plan to have more kids, I probably would’ve stayed with the wagon honestly.

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  5. For the registry I used a site called Lucie’s list to help me make educated/road-tested decisions. It’s like consumer reports for all things baby. It is great and has excellent recommendations for all kinds of budgets for everything from sunscreen to cribs and carseats. https://www.lucieslist.com/ Good luck!

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  6. I say do a co-ed shower! Look up co-ed baby shower themes on pinterest. Plus you are having boy/girl twins so you could do a boy/girl theme like “bow ties and pearls”. Have lots of good food and beer or wine. I was surprised at how overwhelming making a registry can be but just jump in and get started already! XOXO

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  7. Others have said this but I’ll repeat it. Take things one at a time. Break them into small steps if you need to. Register multiple places, start by choosing larger items first and then adding smaller items. You can always return extras or any item if you decide on a different product. I also say go with a co-ed shower if you think the guys would come. Mine was girls only because half my friends were pregnant at the time and talk naturally went to babies and pregnancies the whole time. For the photo shoot, I don’t know what to tell you. I didn’t have a maternity shoot and I’m not terribly sad about that. I really regret not having a newborn shoot so definitely plan one for when you get home.

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  8. You are nesting! Everything will get done. And if there are a few things that aren’t perfect before they arrive, that’s ok. Amazon still delivers even after the birth.

    Also, with what you’ve been through, and the fact that you are having twins, I vote for having a HUGE FREAKING SHOWER. Celebrate these babies!

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  9. Good luck getting it done! Man, cleaning out the garage makes me shudder lol. Ours is a disaster. Good for you two for getting it done, even if it is a process and can’t all be done at once.

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  10. There’s a lot to do, and some must get done before the birth and some can linger on after the birth. I hope you get the photo shoots you want.

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  11. Sounds like you guys made some good progress cleaning out the garage! It’s amazing how much stuff accumulates. I have way too many old shoes I never wear and should go through too. I’m sorry if you don’t get to have your maternity shoot. I was thinking that maybe it would be something nice for Annie also as you could both get your hair/make up done beforehand and then you’d all have some lovely photos after. However I can see how money wise, it could make more sense not to fly over an extra time.
    I’ve been to baby showers without and without the men there. Personally I have preferred the all women ones! The men often seem a bit awkward. In my circles it was often the women who were friends so the men didn’t know each other anyway. That said at one of the showers I went to the baby daddy was really involved and I could see how it was a nice thing for the couple together.

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