Birth Story Part I: Before the Birth

It’s been a few weeks exactly 8 weeks since the birth, but I still can’t believe that Annie kept the babies in for so long/the babies wanted to stay in for so long that we got to travel as planned.  The last nonstress test for us was on Monday September 11, and our scheduled C-section was that Friday.  Annie passed the nonstress test, but that particular test recorded four contractions.  It could be the beginning of something or it could be nothing.  Regardless, I was on high alert from that moment on.  Dr. OB said that if Annie was to have real contractions or if her water somehow was to break, then she’d go right to delivery and wouldn’t be able to wait for any of us to arrive.  The reason was that the drugs to hold off labor would be too dangerous for the babies at that point.  I was truly alarmed by that statement.  We were merely two days away from traveling.  No one knew if the babies would decide to come earlier than planned.  I was hoping and praying that Annie and the babies would continue to hold on tight.  My phone was always with me and any ringing would make me jump.  Annie promised that she would contact me immediately if it got even a little close to her thinking that it was the real deal so maybe we could try to jump on a plane to get there in time.  Because of this, Monday and Tuesday were both a little stressful for me as we had already come so close to delivery.  If we had to fly earlier, we would have to book all the flights, hotel, and car rental last minute at a much higher cost.  Money was not the biggest concern.  If we didn’t have to spend the extra money, it’d be great.  But if we had to, it was already prepared.  Missing the birth all together would be the biggest disappointment of this whole journey.  At the same time, I was trying to keep my emotions in check.  It would be totally okay for the timing to not go my way as long as it meant for the babies to arrive safely.  With this uncertainty, I managed to stay at work until the last planned day. My desk had never been so clean.  My file cabinets were all sorted out.  My therapy room was free of clutter.  My return to work in six months would surely be smooth at least when it comes to space control.  The babies made it possible for me to enjoy my last few days of work before motherhood began.

With our suitcases and two original packages of car seats plus car seat bases in tow, my mom, Bob, and I flew to Annie’s state on Wednesday.  That day was exactly 38 weeks of the pregnancy.  There was no emergency text or phone call from Annie, so we continued our journey knowing that there was a very high chance for us to be able to make it to the birth.  We rented a hotel room right across from the hospital.  It was a room with a king bed and bunk beds, which was just right for the two of us and my mom.  We knew that we wouldn’t be using the room much ourselves during the babies’ hospital stay but it was a good location for a base.  Plus my mom could walk to the hospital without needing a ride from us.  I was grateful that a hotel was available within walking distance to the hospital.  The rental minivan wasn’t something I was used to, but I insisted on driving it (rather than Bob) because I knew full well that a minivan was going to be in our very near future once we got home with the babies.  It wasn’t bad driving it, and that particular make and model actually weren’t too impressive as the cargo space was lacking for all the luggage and stuff we had.  The 2018 Ho.nda Ody.ssey that we drove was much more impressive.  Anyway, I was still appreciative of the available minivan rented at very reasonable rate.

Annie had blood work done at the hospital in the afternoon.  I asked what it was for.  She said that she was told that sometimes a gestational carrier’s blood might mix with the babies’ blood so the blood type had to be confirmed once again before the C-section so that enough blood would be ready in case a transfusion was needed.  Right after the appointment, she and her whole family met us at the hotel before our dinner date.  It was just so nice to see her all healthy and well prior to the birth.  She really did have the best twin pregnancy one could have asked for.  No complications.  No bed rest needed.  She was still driving, still taking walks, and even attending bible study in the evening.  Her bump was big, but wasn’t overly so especially considering that she was at the point 38 weeks pregnant with twins.  We all had a lovely Italian meal with Annie, her husband, two younger kids, her oldest with his fiancee, and her brother.  Afterward, we took a stroll by the lake across from the restaurant.  It was a great time for all of us to catch up with one another and to enjoy each other’s company before all of our lives were going to be changed forever.  I was just amazed that Annie could even take a long walk at that point of her pregnancy.

I was still watching my phone very closely that same evening and of course there was no emergency phone call.  The next day, I was feeling good as we were coming so close to delivery.  I was relieved that we would be able to make it to the birth as we were now staying so close to the hospital.  At the same time, I was still feeling a tiny bit anxious that somehow she wouldn’t make it to the hospital in time if her water was to break or some other emergency happened.  We installed the car seat bases that morning.  We had a lovely visit with Annie’s family that Thursday afternoon as well as to pick up the frame stroller that was mailed to Annie’s house.  Then I asked the question: “Are the babies moving?”  Annie answered, “They were going crazy after dinner last night, but I haven’t felt them much today.”  She said all day long her uterus felt very tight and strange, but it wasn’t really contractions.  Suddenly, my mind was filled with worries because of this.  Annie reassured me that she was certain that the babies were just resting and they were probably getting ready for the birth as the time was near.  But it was hard for me to rest my mind.  I have read too many blogs and been on this journey for too long that stillbirths are very much real in my mind.  It was so hard to shake the worry.  I told Bob who urged me to be excited about the upcoming birth rather than being worried, but my mind just wouldn’t cooperate.  I didn’t tell Annie that I was worried.  Bob could see it in my face though.  Annie did say that she could feel that the birth could be right around the corner even if we weren’t going to have a C-section.  Either way, I couldn’t show her my worries, so I just hid my emotions.  Sitting there in the backyard with this person who had been carrying our babies for so many months knowing that the journey would end very soon was one of the most surreal, strange, and exhilarating moments in my life.  Very difficult to describe.  Right before dinner time, we said our goodbyes.  The next day would be the big day.

That evening in the hotel room my worries continued to consume my mind and heart.  I so desperately wanted to relax and enjoy the last evening before the babies would be in my arms but I just couldn’t.  Bob said that I should text Annie and ask about any movements that she felt that evening, but I refused to do so because I didn’t want to alarm her with my worries.  Excitement, worries, and nervousness were some of the emotions that I experienced that night.  I still managed to have quite a few hours of sleep knowing that it would be the very last night I would be so carefree to sleep through the night.

Annie was due to arrive at the hospital at 5:30am.  I didn’t find any text messages from her, so it meant that she didn’t give birth overnight.  While we were getting ready to head over to the hospital, Bob saw on Fac.ebook that Kenneth, Annie’s husband, checked in at the hospital online.  I was relieved to know that they had already arrived at 5:27am.  When we went to the birth center at 6:25am, Annie was lying in a hospital bed with things hooked up on her belly.  I could see two monitors on the side showing heartbeats of the babies.  That was such a sweet sight for me.  I could at that moment drop all my worries believing that the babies were still there and were waiting to make their debuts into this world.

(to be continued……)

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