Being Annoyed and Then Freaking Out

We are 19 weeks today.  (Woohoo!)

So this is what happened today.

I was super happy celebrating 19 weeks.  We are practically half way through since our C-section has been scheduled for 38 weeks 2 days.  Annie’s headaches seem to be under control (Praise the Lord!) as she has not had them constantly and when she has them, essential oils help to get rid of them.  I get to go see the babies next week.  All in all, things are good.

My therapy kid’s Chinese nanny whom I have known for about three years took one look at me and asked, “Are you pregnant?”  I looked at my little tummy in disbelief and said in Chinese that loosely translates to: “Are you calling me fat again?”  Why I said again was because this wasn’t the first time she had done it.  She had said something similar to me before and I thought that she’d learn from her experience.  Nope.  I guess middle-aged Chinese nannies don’t learn when they have the need to be nosy and ask inappropriate questions.

I kid you not.  The following happened within 5 minutes of the conversation with the nanny.  I got back to a person regarding something that he asked me.  This person happens to be my guy best friend’s brother, and the ex-husband of my brother’s ex-girlfriend (who I wrote about here.)  We hadn’t been in touch but he wrote me a couple of days ago out of the blue asking for help with something.  I finally gave him the information that he needed.  Maybe it was a need for small talk?  He went on to type the following: “How are you these days?  Making a baby?”  My first reaction is, what in the world are these people thinking?  How do they feel the need to ask about someone’s private life without a lot of consideration, especially to a person with whom they hadn’t talked to in maybe 10 years?

I was super annoyed with him, probably more so at that moment because I was just mistaken as being pregnant by someone else five minutes ago.  Instead of letting it go like usual, I wrote, “Ha we are doing well.  And I don’t think that’s a very appropriate question to ask.”  He immediately typed “Sorry”.  I thought about saying more things, like “It’s okay” or some other things for more educational purposes.  But I decided to not respond.  Because it is really not okay for someone to just nonchalantly ask such a question to an acquaintance.  It is simply rude.  Maybe my response was rude.  But I feel that it was necessary for me.

Fast forward this afternoon.  I wrote Annie a message wishing her happy 19 weeks.  Did not hear back from her, which was okay.  Then at 3:45pm, I got a post visit reminder email from her OB/GYN practice thanking her for her visit with them today.  Cue immediate freak out.  I had no prior knowledge of this visit that she had today and my mind went wild.  I wrote her a FB message and then a text.  I then decided to give her a call.  When the phone was connected, there was a little voice that sounded very far away.  I said, Hey are you okay?  I got a post visit reminder from the OB office.  That little voice said yes.  I didn’t realize that it was someone other than Annie so I freaked out even more because in my ears this little voice sounded like he/she was crying but he/she kept saying he/she was okay.  I was like, What was going on why did you go see the OB are you really okay?!?!?  Then Annie’s voice came on the phone.  It was her son who picked up!  In my freaking out mind I just assumed that she picked up the phone.  So this is what happened today.  She said that she had been feeling emotional the last few days feeling stressed out.  A few weeks ago, our OB told her that whenever she feels uncomfortable and feels a need to go get checked out, just go and they’ll do an abdominal ultrasound.  She said that she had felt flutters of movements a couple weeks ago but she hardly felt any movements this week.  Since she’d be going away this weekend on a trip, and she was going to be in town today, she just wanted to go check out the babies and make sure that they were okay.  She didn’t want to tell me ahead of time so that I wouldn’t freak out, and she planned on telling me afterwards.  But the post visit reminder got to me first and caused my freakout session.  I’m not gonna lie.  My heart was about to jump out of my chest when I waited for her to pick up the phone.  She said that the nurse picked up one heartbeat and didn’t bother to look for the other one because both babies were moving and were punching each other.  So obviously they would both have a heartbeat if they were doing boxing together.  LOL.

I am very relieved that everything is fine.  But it goes to tell you that I probably won’t be able to relax for a really long time.  I guess that’s just how motherhood goes?  That I’ll worry about everything?  At least I can sleep well tonight knowing that the babies are alive and well and are already showing sibling love to each other.

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4 thoughts on “Being Annoyed and Then Freaking Out

  1. Well what a day. F that rude lady. No, you were not rude to call that guy out, he needs to learn a lesson. So glad the babies are fine. You have a pretty awesome surrogate who cares so much and wants to check on them without worrying you! Glad her headaches are better, did she find something that actually helped? Or just got better?

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    • Aren’t people rude? Like I get that you are Chinese and I am Chinese, but it doesn’t give you the right to say that I look pregnant. Yeah Annie is very awesome. I am glad she went today, and glad for us to know that the babies are punching away. Her headaches started subsiding about a week ago. Just out of the blue, but did so after several chiro and a couple of acu visits. So I chalk that up to pregnancy hormones. As long as the headaches stay away, I am happy.

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  2. I was asked by complete stranger—yes, Chinese, if I was expecting another baby. I was wearing overalls hat day. When I said no, she just laughed, and I walked away. Sorry you got zinged too! People. Glad babies are thriving. 😊

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