Five Years, and the 100th Post

This is the 100th post of this blog.  I started in June 2013 and can’t believe that I am reaching the 100th mark before this blog reaches a year.  Publishing it on our 5th year dating anniversary is the most fitting thing to do.

Five years ago today, Bob and I went on our first date.  Honestly, I wasn’t impressed with how things went on our first date.  To explain why, I have to give you some background.  Bob grew up as an only child in a Hindu family.  The only way that he knew to get a wife was to follow his parents’ lead and get an arranged marriage.  Before he became a Christian in 2006, his parents arranged for him to meet with a couple of girls, hoping that he would eventually marry one of them.  Things did not pan out.  Bob became a Christ follower and was urged by close Christian friends to not to marry anyone other than a Christian.  So he started an online dating profile.  That was how I met him.  We communicated online for a couple of weeks and I was impressed by his sincerity and his responsiveness on emails.  However, given Bob’s history of his non-dating life and as an only child, he did not know a girl’s expectations of a guy on their first date.  I am the first girl he went on a date with.  And the last girl he will ever be with.  He definitely, absolutely had no experience whatsoever about what a guy should do on a date.  I am not going to go into details here.  They are not important at this point.  All I will say is that, if I based our potential of our future on Bob’s performance on our first date, I would not be writing this post about him now because we would not have gone down the path of getting married.  

What’s more important to mention about is what happened the next day.  After our first date, I woke up at 6:30am and just could not fall back asleep.  I really liked how we interacted on our emails, phone calls, and online chats.  I was conflicted with a few things that happened during our first date.  So at 6:30am, I dialed Bob’s phone number.  Mind you that we parted ways at 11pm the night before.  That poor guy had to drive 50 minutes to get home.  He probably did not go to bed until after midnight if not later.  There I was, a crazy woman calling him up at 6:30 in the morning.  The first woman with whom he had ever gone on a date.  His reaction and response changed how I saw him and the potential for our future relationship.  I told him what bugged me on our first date.  (Lunatic… I know.)  He not only gave me full attention and listened to what I had to say, at 6:30am, he was frank and told me that he did not know these things prior to meeting me.  He said that he would try to learn and remember these things on our future dates. 

I was speechless at that point.  I probably did not really think much before I called him.  I didn’t have an expectation of how the phone call would turn out.  I probably just really wanted to get things off my chest since they bugged me.  But I was touched that he did not mind me calling him bright and early, essentially pointing out all the things that did not go well on our first date.  Not only was he not mad about being woken up at 6:30am but was willing to listen and try.  

That set the tone for our relationship.  He is willing to listen and to learn to love me the way I feel loved.

The rest is history.  I wouldn’t have known the path we were going to take as a married couple.  I thought that we were going to follow the path that I had set for myself: getting married, waiting six months before trying for a baby, getting pregnant within a few months, giving birth at 38, resting a little before trying again, and getting pregnant with number two before 40.

On that first date, I of course would have had no idea what would be in store for us.

The opposition that we faced from Bob’s parents, the fight that he had to put up with them in order to marry me, my surgery, my diagnosis of diminished ovarian reserve, and the numerous decisions that we have had to make as a couple regarding treatments to eventually have a baby.

Nothing has been easy.  But that fateful date on April 4, 2009 and the subsequent phone call on April 5, 2009 sealed our fate as a couple that would face any life’s challenges together.  I didn’t know it at the time.  But I feel so grateful that we met and I made that phone call.  I didn’t know what was going to be our future.  But God did.  And God knows how our story will continue.  We have to trust and obey.

Today, we found an excuse to eat. 🙂  We had dinner at one of our favorite restaurants.

This salad was so so good.

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I had been craving prime rib for a very long time, especially with Yorkshire pudding.

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The night wouldn’t be complete without my favorite dessert:

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Here you go.  My 100th post.  A celebration of this beautiful relationship.  I am truly thankful for what I have in life.

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13 thoughts on “Five Years, and the 100th Post

  1. What a beautiful story! I love your ballsy-ness to call at 6:30 in the morning and I love his humbleness by admiting his dating inexperience. Your story is a good reminder not to get hung up on first impressions, not to be afraid to say what is on your mind and to welcome love when you finally find it! Happy “dating” anniversary to you and Bob!

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  2. I am impressed with the 6:30AM call too! My husband was also, um less experienced in the relationship world. And I am really kind of happy about that most of the time. He listens to what I say when he does things without remembering he is married and tries his best to not repeat it. Bob sounds like a great guy 🙂

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  3. What a great story about your first date. I find it so amusing and profound and true love and romance are often so utterly different from the stereotypes or from what we think they are “supposed” to be. For me honesty, trust and great communication are the sexiest things in the world, but society is always trying to tell us it’s looks that are sexy and fakely “romantic” situations. Bonkers to that. You and Bob share a wonderful story and adventure and I hope it just gets better for you.

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  4. how sweet! I love that he was so caring about your feelings. It is true, we never know what life will bring us. Especially with all the unexpected IF surprises. Its so strange and amazing how life turns out. Nothing is ever according to our plans. Its all in God’s plans. Blessings on your anniversary and for all the years ahead. 🙂

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  5. That’s such a cute story about you and Bob–I’m glad that you called him–what a gutsy move. And I’m glad that he answered! Your trip to Asia should be coming up soon? Are you getting excited?

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    • Yes it’s in 9 days! Coming up soon. It’s going to be so hot in Chennai it’s not even going to be funny. I am definitely getting excited. Can’t wait to eat good food and see my dad.

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